Category Archives: Characters

October 4, 2013 · 2:09 am

WHAT MAKES IT GOOD

Techweek Part 4 –

by storied business consultant, Joe Perogi,

as told to John Jonelis –

Been hearin’ complaints ‘n’ controversy about Techweek this year. People gripe so you figure there’s gotta be a good reason, right? Yeah, I hear you. Yer sayin’, where there’s smoke there’s fire. But all them critics completely miss THE HIDDEN ROOM that you and me stumple upon—the hidden room that makes this thing truly amazing. Now the dust is settled, lemme take you on a tour o’ what I seen. Continue reading →

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Tagged as angel, Chicago, competition, enthusiasm, entrepreneurs, innovation, invention, Investors, Joe Perogi, new ideas, noise, passion, Risk, startup city, startups, techweek, TriNet, vc, venture, winners

September 11, 2013 · 1:42 am

DA LEG BREAKER ‘N’ DA SNAKE OIL

Loop Lonagan and John Jonelis

“I still sez he ain’t nothin but a well-dressed snake oil salesman. Too smooth. Too articulate. Voice too modjoo—madju—modulated. Continue reading →

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Tagged as Alcoholics, bad debts, bull terrier, collect bad debts, compliance, cure for alcoholics, detox, Loop Lonagan, quit drinking, quit smoking

August 12, 2013 · 4:00 am

BNC TUESDAY NIGHT SMACKDOWN

Techweek Part 3 at BNC Venture Capital –

John Jonelis –

The audience roars! This roomful of raucous investors demand answers the way hungry wolves tear at meat. Men and women shout as if in the trading pits of the CME. I see wallets wagging in eager hands, but the kids presenting tonight are unprepared for such a high level of scrutiny and the questions keep coming—one louder than the last. Now the speaker shouts to be heard as the meeting spirals out of control. Continue reading →

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Tagged as customer loyalty, local, local business, local customers, one day delivery, reliable delivery, same day delivery

August 8, 2013 · 4:00 am

THEM WORMS

Bill Blaire – special correspondent

as told to John Jonelis

Bill Blaire here. Jim Kren don’t want you should see this story, ‘n’ scratched it outa the last article but Da Boss overruled him so here it is. I might be talkin’ a victory fer da little guy here, but nobody never accused me o’ bein’ a little guy. Continue reading →

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Tagged as bad smell, bait, garbage, hog waste, landfill, methane gas, natural solution, pig farm, pig waste, pollution, stink, vermiculture, worm farms

August 3, 2013 · 12:03 am

THEM CAKES

Bill Blaire – special correspondent

as told to John Jonelis

Bill Blaire here. Sometimes ya get surprised by a simple little idea—one that ain’t a mobile app er nothin’. Summa them make real nice businesses. I’m at FFF—da Funding Feeding Frenzy where it ain’t just tech—it’s good investments. Continue reading →

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Tagged as cake, cakes, coffee, coffeecake, coffeecakes, corporate gifts, customer gifts, good business, low tech, personal branding, white label, worms

July 24, 2013 · 12:00 am

THE BUSINESS PLAN POLICE

Bill Blaire – special correspondent –

as told to John Jonelis

Bill Blaire here. Lemme tell ya how things develop before all da trouble starts. Continue reading →

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Filed under Characters, Entrepreneur, High Tech, Low Tech, Suspense

Tagged as argue, argument, birdfeud, debate, social media marketing, two sides to every story

July 18, 2013 · 2:43 am

TECH CHILDREN

Techweek Part 2

Mark T Wayne – Special Correspondent

as told to John Jonelis

Permit me to proclaim that, next year, children—yes I say children, should organize Techweek. The event will gain from it. I have good evidence for such speculation, as you will see. Continue reading →

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Tagged as adolescents, children, kids, Leggo robot, Leggo robot competition, Leggos, Prince of Peace school, Robot competition, robots, young inventors, young people

June 25, 2013 · 4:00 am

THE FRENZY

Bill Blair – special correspondent –

as told to John Jonelis

Bill Blaire here. Mr. Jonelis wants I should go to this FUNDING FEEDING FRENZY thing. Says I’m gonna give a completely different slant compared to the resta this crowd here. I cut my teeth in the Local #1 Boilermakers, then as a Cement Contractor till I packed up my tools fer good. Continue reading →

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Filed under Characters, Entrepreneur, Writing style

Tagged as angel, angel capital, Bill Blaire, Blackline Review, Cardoona, Equity investing, fff, Geek Bar, Glenn Gottfried, investor, Jane Pickling, L train, Loan shark, Ludditis, Ludditis Shots & Beer, Phil Murphy, Pierce O'Shea, portapure, Private equity, Rocco Spumoni, Shark Tank, Sharks, Smart Gardner, vc, venture capital

June 24, 2013 · 11:00 pm

MAY IS GONE

We lost Ron May. There’re those that are bitter and those that’ll weep. There’s those that always revere him and swear by his widely circulated May Report—and then there’s the others that still feel the sting. Everybody has a powerful opinion, but I got more than one reason for liking the guy. Continue reading →

WHO DO YOU TRUST?

John Jonelis—Verbatim from special correspondent, Donatas Ludditis

Welcome—welcome to Ludditis Shots & Beer! Glad you come in.

Got question for you.

Don’s lookalike

I hear about this guy: Nikhil Sethi his name. No, don’t ask me—I never say it right. He got easy way to advertise on social web. His outfit called Adaptly. Got three slick platforms that work as if by magic. And his company, it grow like crazy! This I want to know more about. Continue reading →

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Tagged as creative destruction, Donatas Ludditis, easy social media advertising, how do I advertise on social media?, measuring social media advertising, Social Media, social media advertising

June 10, 2013 · 4:00 am

CLEANTECH COMPETITION

Impact Engine—Part 7

John Jonelis – Verbatim from a special correspondent

Loop Lonagan here with a real simple story. I’m at the CHICAGO CLEANTECH COMPETITION watchin’ ten green companies go head-to-head for the chance to move on to the international GCCA contest.

Hey, dis old world needs a good scrubbin’, doncha think? I’m here, trying to use my natural greed on somethin’ constructive fer a change. I glance around and see a company I know has da potential. We’re gonna hear some good stuff. Continue reading →

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Tagged as energy audit for home, energy efficient, energy efficient home, energy efficient old home, energy savings, fixup, free energy audit, free house repairs, green, home energy audit, home upgrade, home upgrade experts, house remodeling, house repairs, small carbon footprint

May 28, 2013 · 4:00 am

MIT WHITEBOARD CHALLENGE

John Jonelis

From special correspondent – Mark T Wayne

Five minutes, a marker, and a whiteboard. That’s all you get with this jaded crowd of critics, skeptics and swarming humanity.

You’ve come here to bare the greatest idea of your life and all the dreams that go with it. You competed for a chance at this grueling event against near a hundred early-stage teams. You’re one of only ten to make the finals.

Now they give the signal and you start like a runner off the blocks. And when your five minutes are up, it’s “NEXT!” No excuse will answer, sir! You are not permitted to utter another word so you sit down to bite your nails. Continue reading →